Wednesday, March 24, 2010

A fun little testimony

You gave me a husband to cherish and honor all our days through, but foolish I was and quite selfish too. I wasted such time and the minutes were many the one's that flew right passed me and my Kenny.

I was hurt and confused, lost and alone, I waited all day for him to come home. The work day had ended and refreshing he needed, but not till I told him how I was depleted.

Since morning had dawned and your children woke up, I slaved and I slaved, and now I'm fed up. Don't you walk away, no stay and just listen, to all I will say and no we're not kiss en'.

God help this man to see who I am, and please make him love me the way I demand. I can't live like this anymore I mean it we're through. Get out of here Kenny right now please do.

I'm sick of this fighting and you just don't see. God please tell me why you forgot about me? Husband's and wife's are supposed to just know, they don't need to force it or work at it so.

Then God showed up when I wasn't lookin', You see all along His plan had been cookin'. He whispered to Kenny of Superbowl fun to be had at the Peckham's when church service was done.

My God had done it, He saved my man, but little did I know of His fantastic plan.

Now God was working in our hearts and minds, He placed by me Jenny the greatest of finds. She told me to be thankful and pray all day through, and she listened to me like a mother would do.

She helped me to read to learn and to grow, with prayers and thanksgiving, God's word would soon show, all of these things that plagued me before would soon be the things that would help me mature.

Love peace and joy would fill up my heart, and I came to see that it all played a part. We are made new, a creation of God's, all we had come through, a couple at odds.

Kenny and I are happy now it's true and we only wish to give the glory to You. So praise be to God for the work that you do. Help us all to see your goodness and kindness shine through.

Thank you my Savior my Lord and my King. You have become our everything. The God of great love and miracles too, I pray you would continue to grow us in You.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010


Have you ever forgotten your cell phone at home? All day you have that feeling like you didn't fully dress before you left the house and now your exposed. I felt strange all day. I couldn't pull my phone out to check the time or check to see if I had any text messages. I was disconnected from the world and vulnerable as I drove south bound on I-5. Then my car alerted me that I was running low on fuel.

"Great, just what I need." "No cell phone in case of emergency, and now I'm running out of gas and I still have a long way to go." Perfect! I was irritated but I calmly took the next exit in hopes I would run into a gas station. After about 5 minutes of driving around and three more low fuel beeps later, I started to get worried.

"God please don't let me run out of gas out here without a cell phone," I thought. I started to talk out loud to reassure myself of God's promises. Philippians 4:6-7 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

"OK, I'm OK, not going to freak out, I'm just going to pray." "Lord please help me to find a gas station, God I don't want to run out of gas." "I need You to lead me to a gas station Lord quickly." "I know You are with me and I don't need to worry about this situation, thank You for that." "You already knew this would happen and You have heard my prayer." "God I pray that if I do run out of gas that You would use it for Your purpose and help me to get through....."

"Anytime now Lord, I'm ready to receive Your merciful answer to my prayer."

"Really God anytime now."

By this point I have 10 miles to go till I'm empty. "OK, God I'm going to just ask this nice lady pushing a baby stroller if she knows where to find the gas station." I wasn't going to get out of my car in an unfamiliar place without a cell phone. So I just pulled up next to this non threatening mom and her baby and asked if she could point me in the right direction. She gladly told me how to get to the gas station.

Praise God! Now I just hope I make it. At long last I pulled into that beautiful Chevron station and breathed a sigh of relief.

Ahhh, thank You God I'm here and strangely enough I actually had money in my wallet. Twenty five dollars ought to get me to my final destination. That's when I saw him. I stepped out of my car and there was a man trying to swindle money from people at the pump.

"Oh gee whiz," I thought to myself, "these people are everywhere, asking for bus fare and always with these sob stories." Of course I had already determined in my mind not to look at him and if he did approach me I was not going to give him my money. I barely had enough for gas for myself. How could I just hand it off to some guy because he tells me a sob story. I heard them all before, besides I have a sick husband and 3 children at home I'm trying to support on what little I had. No, I'm not going to fall for it this time. I will be ready for him. I just started pumping my gas when he addressed me and walked over.

"Hello miss, I was wondering if I could just show you something real quick," he said. He opened up this blue folder and pointed to the first page. I tried not to pay attention but one word stood out to me from that page, "Samuel." "I am a christian writer," he continued, "and I wrote this screen play and some producers in California really like it, they said if I can get down there they would take a look at it." "I was wondering if you would be able to spare a little to help me pay for the bus fare down there, this is really important to me."

It was original I'll say that much. I don't think I've heard that one before. He was an older gentlemen and seemed nice enough. He was dressed clean with a blue coat and a Bennie hat covering his head. He didn't appear to be drunk or impaired by any substance.

"I'm sorry," I said, I am barely making ends meet as it is." Then he said, "Even some spare change would be helpful." I was like a stone, I wasn't going to budge. "I'm sorry I wish I could, good luck though." Then I watched him walk away.

I finished pumping gas and then I got back in my car and headed for I-5. Then I realized I was right by the freeway entrance. Wow, I can't believe I drove around for so long looking for the gas station and it was right here the whole time. I think I must have circled this block twice how could I have missed that. That's strange, I guess I wasn't paying attention. Maybe You had other plans for me Lord. That's when it hit me, like a ton of bricks dropped right in my lap as I merged onto the freeway. "Oh no!" "Did You want me to be at that gas station at that specific time Lord?" "Oh please don't tell me You wanted me to give that man money." "OH NO!!!" "I blew it didn't I?" "I can't believe it that whole time I'm begging You to have mercy on me because I was lost and I needed a gas station and you led me there despite my blind eyes that missed it twice, and then I turn my back on someone who needed something from me."

I felt horrible, I mean really horrible. God had given me an opportunity and without a second thought and without ever stopping to ask Him what I should do, I cut off my compassion receptor and missed a chance to help someone. I turned the radio down and started to ask God for forgiveness. I asked Him to redeem that missed opportunity. I really messed that one up, but God is bigger than my stupidity, able to redeem lost time and missed opportunities. Oh thank You God for forgiving me and I pray for that man Lord, I pray You would provide the bus fare for that man if it is Your will God.
I kept thinking about the man and his little blue binder. The word "Samuel" was the only thing I looked at on the page he showed me. That name reminds me of a story in 1 Samuel chapter 3. God called to a boy named Samuel. Samuel was young and didn't realize it was the Lord calling him so he went into Eli's room and said, "Here I am." Three times the Lord called and three times Samuel ran into Eli's room because he thought Eli must have called him. Finally Eli told Samuel to go back and lie down and if you hear the call again say, "here I am Lord, for Your servant hears." Samuel did just what Eli said and God spoke to him. I wish I could hear God's voice as clearly as Samuel did. I wish I could go back and pay closer attention to what was going on.
I guess I'll never know what could have been, but I do know that I will never forget that long drive home. A little later I turned the radio up and the first words I heard were from a Toby Mac song. "If we loose our way we get back up again, it's never too late to get back up again." "We might be knocked down but not out forever." Wow, though I lacked compassion, God still had compassion for me. He loves me and used those words to bring comfort to my heavy heart. I hope the next time I pay closer attention.